
I feel guilty that I wasn’t productive enough today,
I feel guilty for loosing my scholarship,
I feel guilty for taking so long to reply to your e-mail
for not exercising,
for being a terrible Frisbee player,
for not helping cook supper,
for eating too slowly,
for being indecisive.
I feel guilty for being bored when I have so much to be grateful for.
Sometimes my guilt is so great I think I might break down and cry,
but I never do, because I would feel guilty for crying over my own silly mental problems while I should be finding a way to help the billions of people with real problems such as hunger and poverty and violence.
Somedays I feel like I’m living a masquerade, I feel one way and act another.
I realize it most when I am inexplicably sad - when I feel empty & inadequate. I don’t understand why such a despairing feeling comes over me, and could much less explain it to anyone, thus it is easier to simply put on a fake smile and act like nothing’s going on.
But there are times when that fake smile hurts , both emotionally and physically…
I thought masquerades were supposed to be fun; so what am I doing wrong?
Everybody’s saying, he’s not coming home now
This can’t be happening to me
This is just a dream
- Carrie Underwood, Just A Dream
Sometimes even the things that we think are the most secure and permanent can end.
But that’s not a reason to give up, it just means that something even better is waiting out there. Keep hope, always.
Probably not because I will be out of province when it’s in theatres and I doubt I’ll have time to go see it…
I will however probably see it when it comes out on dvd with a friend of mine who is a Beatles fan, and though she will already have seen it in theatres I know she’ll want to watch it again with me! :)
How many times have I thought this to myself lately? About a million, but here’s one more: “I don’t want to grow up!”
The more I see what growing up is; working, paying off bills, making “social connections,” taking on responsibilities, needing to define your future... the more I realize maybe I’m not cut out for it - I just want to stay a carefree kid forever! I want to go back to playing outside, learning for fun rather than out of necessity, smiling for no reason, back to a time when “nice” wasn’t so rare, when the future was a concept that seemed 1000 years away!
I’d love to never grow up, but logic tells me this isn’t an option, therefore I’ve embraced the next best thing, in my opinion, which is to keep within myself a childish sense of wonder and fun to help balance out that part of me that will inevitably grow up.
(Source: lovelydisney, via adisneybeliever)
Procrastination is a leading cause in the lack of motivation experienced by our generation. We’ve gotten so used to putting off homework, chores, e-mails, exercise, anything that requires effort.
But if you do even a couple of those things, the rest of the list seems more bearable, you’ll take pride in your accomplishments; so go do something!
Life ia all about choices.
You can choose to feed the sadness and apathy, sitting alone in your room, unsatisfied, wishing for something more from your life,
or you can put a smile on and make yourself happy, join in with the party and end up having a good time.
Understand you
Just like I do
Just like you and I were meant to be
- Toy Soldiers, Marianas Trench
Everyone is looking for their Montague or Capulet, that person they can fall immediately for and know they are meant to be together. & I believe it is possible, that we each have someone, we just need to find them, like Romeo and Juliet, we may have to break the rules to find them, they may be deemed unacceptable and we may have to fight for love, but when you have a love as true and passionate as R&J, you’ll do anything to keep it.
Imagine what the world would be if we will, we just
Think good thoughts, stop the bad from feeding,
Oh won’t let the negativity turn me into my enemy.
- Think Good Thoughts, Colbie Caillat
Turn on the news and nothing but bad news is being recounted…so what is to be understood from this? We need to take it upon ourselves to balance this out by doing good, by thinking good thoughts. We need to be the colour in a black and white world.
This is a glimpse at my summer; when I’m not at work, I plan to escape to the cottage where I can happily read by the lake for hours on end.
A dream come true!
(Source: sombersea, via badparenting)